We all find ourselves having to forgive at some point in our lives, but sometimes it can be hard to do so. But it is not impossible! There are people out there who have forgiven the worst crime against them, while there are people who cannot forgive being cut off in traffic.
If you are one of the people who has a hard time forgiving even the smallest act against you, then you may want to take some things into consideration the next time you are forced to decide whether to let go of the trespass or to harp on it forever.
Perhaps the biggest thing that has helped me forgive is knowing that forgiving someone doesn’t have to mean that you deny that the other person did something wrong against you, and it doesn’t make what they did any better. You don’t have to admit the act was okay and forget it. You just forgive the person or situation and move on. In short, you will receive peace and you will move on with your life when you put forgiveness in place of anger and revenge.
Listen To Dr. Maya Angelou’s Advice About Forgiveness
The greatest advice that Maya Angelou has ever gotten was to forgive. It is around the 2:00 minute mark, but it is worth listening to.
What I got from this video is that forgiveness helps you to protect yourself. When you are able to forgive, you stop the negative feelings, thoughts, and the consequences of those feelings and thoughts, and protect yourself.
I’m reading a book on the placebo effect right now, and from what I have learned so far, I know that your thoughts are directly influencing the health of your body and state of your mind. Forgiving is a choice that affects every aspect of your health and happiness in a positive way. It makes forgiveness a no-brainer in my book!
Forgiveness in Relationships Directly In Your Life
When you don’t forgive others in your current relationships, whether they are friends, family, spouses, or even coworkers, then those issues manifest themselves later on during arguments or in conversations they have no place in. You may bring up ‘that time’ or ‘that negative behavior’ or something else that you have not forgiven yet. When that happens, bad memories and old negative feelings are stirred up, and you start to feel negatively towards the other person all over again.
You also make the other person feel bad all over again. If you never let go of what they did to make you upset, then this will become a never-ending circle that may cause you to eventually lose your relationship from your life completely. Sometimes that is a good thing, because the relationship is toxic to you and ending the relationship is the best solution, but sometimes you end up losing a very good relationship over something that you cannot let go.
Forgiveness of People Not in Your Direct Life
Strangers and acquaintances do bad things to you that are hard to forgive because they don’t really care about you the way loved ones do. For instance, a neighbor can make your life hell, or a bad co-worker can always take the credit for your hard work. All of these things can weigh on your mind and be hard to let go of. You may think about them and complain about them and literally make yourself sick over these people who don’t give a crap about you.
You have to forgive these people, not necessarily to their face, but in your own heart.
You have to accept that these people are who they are and don’t care whether you are upset or not. They are not going to change simply because you are mad at them.
How do you forgive strangers?
- Sometimes confronting them and letting them know they can’t do these things to you will help you forgive.
- Sometimes ignoring them and moving on will help you forgive. After all, you don’t have to deal with them again if you don’t want to.
- Sometimes tapping (EFT) for forgiveness can help.
Whatever you have to do to stop thinking about their actions (and possibly getting revenge) – do it. You will feel better afterwards. Remember, they are not worth your health.